Britany Clara I get excited when I go out with someone for the first time. It’s simple: If I think you’re amazing and you’re like, ‘I like you and I like kissing you and you like kissing me,’ then I want to spend a lot of time with you. That sounds like pretty casual dating, right? I mean, it always has been that way for me. Why wouldn’t you want to spend as much time as possible with someone you think is amazing?
Because of course there are rules
You know the rules I’m talking about. We hear them from our casual dating friends. We read them in magazines and blogs, and entire books have been written about them. The outdated rules of casual dating uphold the patriarchy that women and women have always had to follow. Sure, they change slightly every decade (i.e. no one waits at home for a landline anymore), but they’re the same. Casual Dating Don’t gives up on “it” so quickly. Let him prove himself.
These rules are so ingrained in our casual dating consciousness that, unfortunately, there is some truth in them. Just as women and femmes are told to do things a certain way, men and other masculine people are told that a “worthy” woman does things that way. So sometimes playing by the rules works.
But here’s the question: Do you want a man who plays by these rules? Who would think they’re only “worthy” if they don’t go on a casual date with someone within a certain period? Who would play around with games instead of acting like an adult and saying “I love you”?
Not.
With that in mind, here are 7 outdated rules about casual dating that should follow the same path as landlines:
Casual dating
The idea that a man should pay for everything, from dinner to casual dating to gifts, dates back to the late 19th century, when women first started working in big cities but didn’t make enough to pay for their nights out. These girls were called “girls” because they weren’t directly paid for their services, but movie tickets and dinners came with sexual expectations.
I know we still make less than men, but many of us make enough to support ourselves. If you want to sleep with a guy, sleep with him. But don’t create a situation where you feel obligated. And invite him out sometimes too! I promise. Men love to be pampered just like us.
He should say “I love you” first
I’ve never followed this casual dating method because I fell in love so quickly. Sorry for the long story short, but how about when you like someone? You realize it. Very early on, like, two weeks later, I don’t know, it might be emotionally immature to say that, but generally speaking, if you feel it and you think they feel the same way, say it, it’ll come out anyway.
